To the future in reverse...
I want them to sell fireworks.

Welcome to the Intervalist organization of tomarken.com. This category is reserved for those contributors that submit on a regular basis under the same name. In order to become part of this organization, you merely need to send a request to respond/@/tomarken.com (you must remove the slashes from around the @) after you have demonstrated a consistency in your work as determined by those awfully shady people that moderate this site.

The Intervalists are listed below…click on their name to find out more about them and to view a comprehensive list of their objects.


Front page image for Official Statement from the Moderator on the instigations of Dr. Yarrum at Tomarken.com.
2005-01-09, Daniel P. Beckmann. Official Statement from the Moderator on the instigations of Dr. Yarrum:

Tomarken.com will celebrate its three-year anniversary at the end of this month. Throughout all of that time there has been one person who has always wondered what was going on with tomarken, was it going to rise again? Did he see a sputter of activity? You could always trust him to interact with every part of this site-his responses were so many I haven’t even put up half of them yet. I don’t exactly know if it was a generational thing or what happens to people when they get old, but Dr. Yarrum kept track of things, and often wondered why others didn’t do the same.

Front page image for Unified Theory of Philosophy at Tomarken.com.
2005-01-05, Dr. Yarrum. Unified Theory of Philosophy:

In what may indeed be Dr. Yarrum’s opus… posted here now, after his passing….
“All other so-called philosophies constitute an industry, a .source of income and notoriety that fights to perpetuate itself for its own glory.”

Front page image for Extinction Watch! 2005: American Movie, Guns n' Roses, and Quantum symmetry. at Tomarken.com.
2004-12-17, Research. Extinction Watch! 2005: American Movie, Guns n’ Roses, and Quantum symmetry.:

Extinction Watch! 2005 Tomarken’s faithful moderator of modulation returns to close out the year with this alarming discovery with regards American Movie, Guns n’ Roses, and quantum physical symmetry. Please read, for all of our safety.

Front page image for Discourse at Tomarken.com.
2004-11-11, Daniel P. Beckmann. Discourse:

This night before the election, with self-righteous, self-serving people canvassing normal places all around the country spreading their doctrine like a leaper in nudist colony–I’d like to raise one last time for that ol’ Discourse Hear Ye, hear ye–May this object milepost these horid times.(In this rare case I actually pleade forgiveness for my sloppiness for I, like many others am a tired, tired man)-submited by Daniel P.Beckmann, Moderator of Letters

Front page image for Plenty to Play with through Internet Dating at Tomarken.com.
2004-10-04, Dr. Bill Mendelshon. Plenty to Play with through Internet Dating:

Back as if nothing happened… we exhude Dr. Bill’s Triumphant Return!! Embrace his 4th Pillar of Wisdom in Plenty to Play with through Internet Dating–and this time he’s hiting the target audience!-submitted by Dr. Bill Mendelsohn

Front page image for Statement of Moderation #6 at Tomarken.com.
2004-10-01, Daniel P. Beckmann. Statement of Moderation #6:

Over 1-Million smashes and I’m happy to report that this place is still alive enough to continue to perplex the faces of those who hold genuine wondermeant as to our intended purpose. Here we shall try again–sprinkling in some conjecture on what structurally may cause such bewilderment in our society–while also clearing up some other accumulating issues-Behold: Statement of Moderation #6 by our count.

Front page image for hipsters at Tomarken.com.
2004-09-20, Ambivilen. hipsters:

For every hipster that I see / that strives against redundancy / I always see another one / that takes redundancy and runs.

Front page image for A letter to Michael Moore at Tomarken.com.
2004-06-28, Criticism. A letter to Michael Moore:

Flint, Michigan…the community that nurtured the career of idealogue, Michael Moore. Provoked from events leading up to his recent outing, fellow rust-beltor Daniel P. Beckmann begets the Sandlerian question, Mr. Moore, are you too good for your home? A letter to Michael Moore

Front page image for The Great Communicator at Tomarken.com.
2004-06-08, Ambivilen. The Great Communicator:

Associations in one’s mind can truly only be achieved by the beholder…in the case of one Ronald’s death this week, we as a country are mourning those associations we had for the man so oftenly referred to as The Great Communicator-submitted by Daniel P. Beckmann

Front page image for THE TOMARKEN INTERVIEW SERIES:The Gun Toter! at Tomarken.com.
2004-05-24, F. Nick Michaels. THE TOMARKEN INTERVIEW SERIES:The Gun Toter!:

On behalf of Tomarken, Intervalist F. Nick Michaels on recent ocasion sat down with his 20-year old neighbor to try to understand why he needs 4 guns in his apartment in the tiny little college town of Pullman, WA. Here’s an oppurtunity to learn the motivation directly from one of these mystical Gun Toting creatures without having to directly fear for one’s life–thank you F. Nick, and from all of us at Tomarken, overlord’s speed.

« Previous PageNext Page »

Creative Commons License
Some Rights Reserved 2001-2006, Tomarken.com/Tomarken.org. All objects are the property of the individual contributors. Tomarken.com is the house and some of the rights to the design, concept and idea of that house are reserved by Tomarken.com/Tomarken.org. Tomarken.com/ Tomarken.org resides not for profit and is maintained by its board of moderators.