To the future in reverse...
Safety experts say school bus passengers should be belted.


Front page image for THE TOMARKEN INTERVIEW SERIES:The Gun Toter! at Tomarken.com.
2004-05-24, F. Nick Michaels. THE TOMARKEN INTERVIEW SERIES:The Gun Toter!:

On behalf of Tomarken, Intervalist F. Nick Michaels on recent ocasion sat down with his 20-year old neighbor to try to understand why he needs 4 guns in his apartment in the tiny little college town of Pullman, WA. Here’s an oppurtunity to learn the motivation directly from one of these mystical Gun Toting creatures without having to directly fear for one’s life–thank you F. Nick, and from all of us at Tomarken, overlord’s speed.

Front page image for Penguin Emperor at Tomarken.com.
2004-02-09, F. Nick Michaels. Penguin Emperor:

The usual assumption is that the story of U.S. continental expansion is one part Oregon Trail, one part manifest destiny, and one part cowboys and Indians. But who knew the missing ingredient was nutso short guy whose favorite part of 1980s California is water slides? Learn how the "Penguin Emperor" tried his best to help the U.S. stretch to the Pacific.-submitted by F. Nick Michaels

Front page image for Proposal 3 at Tomarken.com.
2003-12-30, F. Nick Michaels. Proposal 3:

As thousands of wealthy hippies flock to Florida for four days of phishing and Dick Clark gets polished up for another run, we are left to ponder the monotony of the celebration of New Year’s Eve. F. Nick Michaels offers a way to break the chains in Proposal 3

Front page image for State of the Union at Tomarken.com.
2003-03-02, F. Nick Michaels. State of the Union:

Now that we’ve had some time, here’s BOOSH’s State of the U again, as interpeted by F. Nick Michaels Do you remember it quite this way?

Front page image for One MO Senate Debate at Tomarken.com.
2002-10-24, F. Nick Michaels. One MO Senate Debate:

Oh Mel!…Sure, you were a mediocre governer at best, but if you wouldn’t have died so tragically days before your election in 2000, we either wouldn’t have had Attorney General Ashcroft becuase you would have lost, or maybe you would have won, but either way we would not been forced to live through One MO Senate Debate. BUT, you croked so now F. N. Michaels brings his vast debate scoring experience to decide who won this sham on the few merits the candidates offered.

Front page image for Inspired by Sept. 11th:Commercialism and Jingoism at Tomarken.com.
2002-10-17, F. Nick Michaels. Inspired by Sept. 11th:Commercialism and Jingoism:

I don’t know about you, I really don’t…but I am tired of hearing not only Sept. 11th, but especially the events of Sept. 11th. Maybe I’m not alone…but there is a reason for all of this you should know, Inspired by the events of Sept. 11th:Commercialism and Jingosim-submitted by F. Nick Michaels

Front page image for Proposal 2 at Tomarken.com.
2002-07-04, F. Nick Michaels. Proposal 2:

Lets face it…the rich have many enemies, especially when considering there’s a whole lot less of them then there are poorer people in this world. Now comes Proposal 2-a way leveling out the playing field so that rich don’t feel so darn isolated!!-submitted by intervalist F. Nick Michaels

Front page image for Evening News on Drugs at Tomarken.com.
2002-05-18, F. Nick Michaels. Evening News on Drugs:

Using scare tactics like calling this object: Evening News on Drugs…are apparently highly effective ways of getting our point accross while scaring all the grandmothers at the same time!-submitted by Intervalist F. Nick Flashnick

Front page image for The Accident at Tomarken.com.
2002-02-28, F. Nick Michaels. The Accident:

BEEP! BEEP!…One hundred years ago, those considering the Progressive moment and Laissez Faire Economics could not have possibly enjoyed the pleasure of an obscure on-th-road experience.-submitted by Intervalist F. Nick Michaels-db

Front page image for Paradox of the Pledge at Tomarken.com.
2002-02-24, F. Nick Michaels. Paradox of the Pledge:

“The government controlling the school which I attended was so vain that it taught little children this patriotic oath even though it would be years until they knew what they were saying.” submitted by F. Nick Michaels,-db

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