To the future in reverse...
"Neutrality is not dead," said the Swiss Ambassador to the United Nations, "It is just not so relevant anymore." - New York Times > F. Nick Michaels > The Accident (02-28-02)
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F. Nick Michaels
circa 1996-Allentown, PA

I was driving down the street trying to decide whether to turn right now or wait for the next road. I decided that it wasn¹t too late and decided to turn here. I turned hard and the car started to skid. I turned into the skid but didn¹t have any road left in front of the curb. I hit the curb and (by account of the cop that soon came) jumped over the sidewalk and into the mulch pit that housed some shrubs and a couple of small trees. One of the trees stopped the car and bent the bottom of the front bumper. The windshield cracked from the impact and the airbags came out. I saw the gas coming out of the airbags and immediately got out of the car, not knowing what the gas was. I realized it was what it was and went back to turn off the car and take out the keys. The aforementioned cop showed up and told me she just watched me get air from the stop sign across the street. She asked if I wanted an ambulance to come look at me and remarked that she was surprised I didn¹t go through the windshield. I had a small ringing in my ear, a little scratch on my thumb, and a little cut on my leg, so I didn¹t want to deal with the ambulance. A second cop showed up, and so did a tow truck, and a third cop who dropped off a camera with which the second cop took pictures. I gave the first cop the information she needed to fill out a summons for destruction of city property. I restarted the car to back up from the shrub pit to the sidewalk, and then to the street for the tow truck, and the car made a horrible noise. Maybe some type of buzzer for when the airbags come out. It didn¹t seem like anything under the car or under the hood was damaged. It was Sunday, so when they towed me to the car place it was closed and I had to fill a bunch of stuff on this envelope and use it to leave my key. The tow truck guy drove me back to my place so I could get my wallet and pay him. I went inside and made Velveeta Shells and Cheese while I called my dad.

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