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Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour. > Ambivilen > The INVOICE (10-26-02)
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10.21.02-Brooklyn, NY


Hello! Thank you for placing your order with The Roxy-Flug Cooking Surplus Emporium.

Your order for:

1. The gogotron multifaceted blender

2. Four (4) Bamboozled Alloy Wok-Sets

3. Stoked Stoker Steak’Um Smoker

are on their way! Plus, did you know, you qualify for a free gift!!! Yes, you, __ Tomarken__ will receive

1. Mew-too, (”the prehistoric cat — with an attitude”) absolutely free. Yes, Mew-too, you’ve seen him on TV, you’ve heard about him in the movies, and now he’s coming straight to your FRONT DOOR. “What is he good for?" you ask. To which we hastily reply: “What ISN’T he good for?” Don’t you know that Mew-too is good for nearly everything?

Mary T. Olsword writes:

Dear Roxy-Flug Cooking Surplus Emporium,

I am so happy that I received my Mew-too. Why, he’s the perfect addition to my inflatable cat collection, and, as the box says, he has quite an attitude. In fact, my children are terrified of him! Don’t you know that he stabbed our black lab in the throat? What a laugh riot! Of course, the children were in therapy for months. Try telling a shrink that a talking balloon killed beloved Sparky in cold blood and you can see why I was almost put in prison for psychological cruelty. In conclusion, Mew-too is the balloon that never learns.

Love, Mary T. Olsword, Author “A rat of a different color” (Coplar Press, 1999).

We believe this testament speaks for itself.

Best Regards!

Roxy-Flug Cooking Surplus Emporium

PS The Bamboozled Alloy Wok-Sets have been linked to cataracts due to the pure white light which constantly beams from its kaleidoscopic center.


Please send cash, check or money order to

Roxy-Flug Cooking Surplus Emporium

332 State St.
Bedham, Mass. 01056

Your total is:


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